I’m sure you guys are wondering what this post is about. No- it’s not about Kanan (the dashing stand up comedian with a creepy smile on the left). It’s about ‘Fraandship’.
Urban Dictionary – When you receive dms from south asian men for looking cute…
My definition – Fraandship is a code word that creepy guys use to get to know you. No, it doesn’t mean they want to be friends. Yes, the more ‘aaa’s they add in the fraandship, the more desperate they are for your attention.
How do I know this? Let me tell you my sob story…
I was naive, young and very polite in my first year of college. It was a social nicety to greet people, respond to them and in general entertain conversation. Little did I know, that the boy’s hostel in Warangal was swamped with ‘fraandship’ seekers who seemed to be attracted to the girl’s hostel like a moth to a flame. They would be repeatedly ignored, but as most Telugu movies teach us:
“The stronger the girl resists, the more she is secretly in love with you and the longer she wants you to pursue her”
We’re all engineers. We can break this down!
A is transitive to B
B is transitive to C
A is transitive to C
Makes sense right?
Given this logic, there was a young, but not-so-dashing man, who sought it well within his social boundaries to keep pinging me and ask to become frands.
He would text compliments such as:
“Hai sruti, I saw u in cls nd wz lyk wow. Cn v b frz?”
I was flattered but did not reply. It got super annoying very quickly though.
“Haii sruti, y u no reply. I m nyc boi. Jst wnt 2 b frns”
“Helo? Plz reply n let me knw if v cn b frns”
“Helo?! Y u no reply?!”
“Helo?! thr???? Helo Helo!!”
All of which was very amusing of course. My first reaction to his texts naturally was:
Of course, I did recover and continued to ignore. Still, this chap was not able to get the hint that I’m not interested in replying to him.
Agitated, I get a text from the grammar killer one day:
“Y u so rude?!! Y u no reply?? I jst wnt to b frns. I m nyc boi only!
Jst bcuz u hv beutiful face u thnks ur gods?!!!”
WELLL. Nowww I lost it. Picked up the phone and replied:
“Thnks tht u thnk I hv beutiful face bt no, I dnt thnk I am gods(plural). I no wnt 2 b ur frnd. U may b nyc boi, but I dnt evn knw u. So plz, stp txting or I wil tell chief warden”
Problem solved. No ‘txts’ from the grammar killer anymore. I wonder if he got the sarcasm though? I’d be impressed!
Please find below amusing conversations that my female friends have had with grammar killers in their lives :’)
Our male friends have always teased us about the amount of attention we get from these GKs. When asked why they don’t approach women themselves, they shrug and say ‘because.. she’ll think I’m a creep’. That’s amusing to hear because these guys are completely date-able. They have no reason to believe that any woman with reasonable taste would turn them down. But because these grammar killers have caused overwhelm… women get a little defensive around guys they don’t know.
Anyways, clearly, these GKs are noteworthy. On many occasions, when I and my friends are reminiscing our college days, bitter after a disappointing date – we find ourselves wondering how things would’ve gone with these charming men… and worrying that we missed out!!
What do you think?
Should we have given these guys a shot? 😉