He was 15 when his Hungarian parents thought it would be best for him to come to live in the UK with another family. His parents were refugees in …Mental – I – zation
All of us know the impact our parents have on us. More often than not, their needs become our needs, their insecurities become our insecurities and their baggage becomes our baggage. In this whirlwind of emotions, it is easy to forget that parents themselves have learned these behaviors and are empathic human beings who may be willing to unlearn it for the sake of their children.
Recently I have met a Professor of Psychotherapy, a Consultant Psychiatrist and a GP – all parents of children lost to mental illnesses. Here’s what one mum says:
“Whenever I have seen a therapist, they have gone straight to my childhood, my up-bringing, my parents and their parents. All my behaviours and feelings seem to be explained and understood based on their behaviours, however ‘normal’, for their times. I am encouraged to think of all the ways in which they could have directly or indirectly damaged me.
By that principle, all of my child’s behaviours and feelings should be explained and understood based on the behaviours of his parents. Half of them is me. I agree. I must be part of the problem. My profession is perceived as a bigger problem. ‘High achieving Asian’ parents are assumed to put a lot of pressure on their children. So much so, the…
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I think I want to be a therapist. Because: I want to work with people, but in a way that I feel involved with their lives. I want to have a personal relationship with my clients. I want to work with them in a way that touches their lives. I remember when I was a really small... Continue Reading →
I did not plan on writing this post. I'm not going to edit it. I'm not going to design it. I'm going to write because I need to- I'd hate myself if I didn't. This is not a movie review. I do not write movie reviews. Please don't read the post if you haven't seen... Continue Reading →